Intuitively Counterproductive

Tuesday, 07 July 2009 at 22:23

What a truly fascinating way to describe the majority of the populace.

Hello to you, oh disciples of bovinity!

I love the English language with all it's twists and tums, it's capacity to relate a plethora of messages with it's double entendres, and folksy expressions...until it goes to far.

I find myself caught between two worlds on a regular basis, an intellectual language aficionado, and a down home redneck with an abundance of homey slang dredged from a childhood fascinated by such august personages as Bo and Luke Duke as well as an immersion into what I now know as Irish folk sayings passed on innocently enough from my forefathers and their kin.

So what exactly am I saying here? You're asking yourself, "Is Tyler leading into something humorous?"... I can only answer that up to this point in this note, that I have not the foggiest idea where I'm going, only that like the majority of the populace, I'm plodding on without a clue, but unlike them, I am aware that my journey will result in something determined by my own volition, and not by accident.

slips away from the computer to gather his thoughts, cast upon the floor amongst a cornucopia of abandoned projects, fills his cup with a strong concoction of Columbian bean juice and wanders back to the monitor and keyboard and stares for a few minutes...

People are interesting. I can sit and watch them for hours on end going through their lives like the many parts of a machine that for all intensive purposes should never work. I used to gather my paper and writing utensils and find myself in a coffee shop writing away whilst the twisted and worn cogs of the machine hurried past me in their blissful ignorance. That was then, with the banning of smoking anywhere near the machinery, I find myself in storage while it's okay for redundant features to continue on fouling the gears.

I think I have a direction in this article now good reader, but be aware that my writings still tend to wander off the beaten path whenever I find an intersection that may lead me to something exciting and albeit non-informative, but inevitably fulfilling to my desire to rant on a differing subject than what I've been digesting and disgorging.

slips outside and lights up a coffin nail and breathes deeply gathering his thoughts and seeking some further enlightenment, only to come to the previous conclusion derived from his coffee... people as a whole are stupid, and ponders on why smoking is banned from public, but morons are still allowed to regurgitate their banalities with reckless abandon


We're in a world of blamelessness, where everyone gets to shed their responsibilities on society as a whole... and what bothers me most about this is that it took some intelligent, sensible individuals to create this world of doublespeak and victimization. People as individuals can be intelligent, but put them together in a committee and we create an amorphous blob that is "Intuitively Counterproductive".

I can almost see it from a religious perspective...

"Lo, and the greater being was created by the will of the masses and the offers of grants and substantial paycheques... and it was called a focus group that would care for the newly created minority that man never knew existed."

stops to swear at the automatic spell check, 'Canadian English my ass,' he curses as paycheque is not identified as proper spelling

I saw the ease in which these acolytes of the machine found a way to milk the gears and wheels with psycho-babble, and I thought that perhaps I too could find 'self-actualization" and a corner office, devoid of personality in the ministry of victimization... but alas good peruser of my incessant babbling, I found myself too transparent and they saw through my guile... as I said before, they are individually intelligent, and they knew I would only corrupt their system and possibly force them to be productive... so they forced me to pursue a useful profession that is actually a benefit to others...damn them all and their narrow-minded requirements.

I'm convinced that they actually do very little, and my jealousy of their pensions, benefits and excessively extravagant paycheques drives me as much as my disgust in what they have done to the individual.

I was brought up in a poor, but honest home where I had chores and responsibilities. Sometime in the early to mid 1980's, everything changed with the addition of (insert a Boris Karloff inspired laugh)...counselors (Bass drum beats a somber dum-dum-DUMB!). Suddenly I was thrust into this world of nebulous truisms surely inspired by Orwell's 1984, and I was informed that I was emotionally distant, stuck in denial, and aggressively inclined due to my inability to get closure... this person got paid to tell me in ambiguous terms that I was an angry teenager that needed to grow the hell up.

Everyone can claim victimhood now! Hell yeah! ADD, OCD, PMS... everyone of you can now claim an acronym or two and go on with your life being blameless for all that you do because your upbringing and genetics for everything!

What a glorious new world our society has created! Hallelujah! This will, someday in the future, be called the Golden Age of the Counselor. They will look back in awe and wonder that their world was run by the mediocre intellects and politically correct, whilst the intelligentsia whiled their way ranting on Facebook etcetera, or deriving better methods of liposuction and other elective surgeries.

I like this subject, I feel that I could, if I was inclined, to write endlessly for hours lambasting this portion of society with reckless abandon. "Damn the torpedoes! there be acronyms off the port bow!"

but alas, I'm ADHD and it's my parent's fault I have the attention span of a gnat, so I'll leave this subject for now and wander about aimlessly through my home trying to find self-actualization from the lower shelf of my fridge amongst the beer.

steps away from the pc, and ponders on whether he's as fucked up for fighting the machine verbally, as those who've accepted their evident victimhood... "Screw it," he mutters and gathers a beer in hand, twists off the cap and toasts to Darwin, "May you prove right, and may these people die off and improve the gene pool."